out of control .

latelyy , i've been all over the placee . i dont know what i want anymore . my mindd is spinning . one minute i want you . the other i want him . im desperately in need of advice and it seems like i cant tell anybody anything anymore . , people is too shady now a days and i dont trust em one bit ! "Scared of Lonely" has been on repeat all day . it explains exactly how i feel right now . i know i've always had that "i dont need a man to make me happy" mentality , but lately it seems that has washed down the drain . shitt fuckk , i have no idea what im saying right now . ugh im just trippin . nobody fucking understands ! including me . .

Bestfriend.

♥ Shamirrrr!
I ♥ my best friendd Shamir Jasmine Mariee :) I'm so glad I had the chance to know her because she is absolutely the most caring, funniest, understanding, not to mention stylish girl I know. I'm gunna miss her SO muchh when she moves to Ohio on Monday. I honestly don't know what I'm gunna do without her cz I don't fuckk wit nobody else like thatt. lol. I guess I'll just be anti-social. Nahh jkk lol I'm too friendly for that. But no one can replace her. She is the definition of a true best friend. We tell each other everythingg!; even when we get on each other's nerves. Ugh i know this isn't the end because we swore that we were gunna go to college together. Hah and if that doesn't happen we will definitely be sharing a condo in New York. We've known each other sincee 7th grade when I was a white girl and she was the ghetto girl with the side ponytail. Those were the days when she didn't know that fish pooped lmao. In 8th grade, I used to hate it when she gave me points for everytime I said/did something stupid. Like she was my mama or somethin? Aha she so crazy. Omg she was the one who took me to my first "black" party lol cz I was such a Hollister/A&F girl she wanted me to break out and booty shakee. That night I learned how to dance on a guy. Lmao it sounds so stupid now. Aah there's soo much I can say about her and the funny ass times we hadd but now my hand hurts. Lol sooo long story short, I love this girl and we plan on being best friends f o r e v e r ( like 21 ) :D lame!

blahhh,

whyy are relationships so difficult? when i was single, i loved talking to whoever i pleased but often i complained about not having a boyfriend. as soon as i get one, i don't feel right. either i've just been going out with the wrong dudes, or idk what i want. probably bothh lol. i used live by my phrase  "i'm single for life!" and didn't give a fuck about niggas that liked me bc i realized that at the end of the day, they don't really care about you. ugh i guess i know what it means now when boys say that girls are complicated cz i know damn sure i am! omg and why is it when you get wit somebody, all these boys come out the blue!? i dont have time for thiss lol; summer's comin up and ima be workin. i think i need to focus on me.

Alicia Keys- "Unthinkable (I'm Ready)"

i'm so in love with this song since day one when her album came out. it's unbelievable lol. the lyrics are so real and sweet :) and when i found out she had a video for it ; it just made me love it even moree. damn , Chad Michael Murray is so FINE ! he's in my top five listt of cute white boys. next is Zach Efron aha. but anywayss. . watchh it if you haven't already!

There Goes My Babyyy lol ♥

todayy,

today i did absolutely nothing .
& usually i would be complaining about how there's nothing to do
but today i didnt mind doing anything productive (:
it was rainin like almost hallf the dayy which made me wanna sleep of course.
and stupidd malik kept calling mee tryna wake me up.
urgg . .thats one of my pet peeves!
but w/e. thats why i keep my phone on silentt.
DO NOT BOTHER ME WHEN IM SLEEPING. anyways, i had a lot of time to think
about my lifee today. & i realized that i dont like half the people i hang out
with. dont worry, that'll be changed asap.
i've alreadyy deleted numbers from my phonee. since i dont need em, there's no need
in using up MY spacee. =/
"unthinkable" by alicia keys has been on repeat all day on my itunes. & i know im WAYY late on listenin to wiz khalifa, but i actually didnt like him. i know SO many people would disagree but idgaf.
now im off to go watchh mean girls for the x5772493 time and eat ice cream. bye.

hmphh . .weed;

UGH, everybodyy i know is smokin weed noww. =/ ehhh!

-M.I.A.

damnnn, i havent been on here in FOREVER!
whats happeninnnnnnn ? lol i been so busyy lately i havent hadd time to blogg.
sorry =/ but thanks for following mee still!
life's good. well kindaa.
finally got a mann lol. but im still not satisfied for some reason.
he told me he loved me; but i dont believe him bc we've only known eachh other
for a shortt amount of timee. .wtf.
butt whatever i guess.
i dont really careee. anyways, i was so fckin pissed/sadd the other dayy.
my bestie is movin to Ohio and idk wtf ima do without her.
i've known her since likee 7th gradee and she's stuckk by me ever sincee. i dont even muchh fck with these other girls so i guess its gon be "me, myself, and i" =/
ughhhhh . fml. but other than thatttttt . . .
ima tryy to keep this blogg updatedd as muchh as possiblee :) byee bitches!
-Lyshh

Randomm,

soo ever since i went on a fake safari in disneyworldd, i been wantin to go to africaa! lol idkk whyy. actually yeahh i do. i wanna go on a REAL safari. i wanna see zebras, and cheetahhs chasin us & stuff. i thinkk it'll be fun and scaryy at the same timee. haha. but uhhh. . before i die, i will most likely be visiting there. i also wanna go to France(: k thats it. byee.

yellow is the new ishhh :)

I WANT THESEEE !

true.love.waits.

it all started when i got my ring almost two years ago. at the time i was sure i was going to wait before marriage. i knew that would be a while from now, but i didn't mind. well all of that has changed now. i didnt realize how much temptation and pressure was out there! & believe me i am almost to the point of breaking my promise. im feeninnn and thinkin about things. . lol its crazy. right now, i kind of dont care about losing it. i know when i get older i'm going to regret it, so thats one reason why i DO need to care. but ughhh idkk. how do youu feel about thiss ?

Nicki Minaj

well i'm not really a big fann of her. okk i DO likee her musicc & her mixtape: Beam Me Up Scotty is my shitttt. .but i thinkk i would like her moree if people weren't so obsessive over her! we got lil gurls tryna change they last name to Minaj, & sayyin they a "bad bitchh", & callin themselves "Barbie". btw: NONE of yall even look halfwayy like a Barbie doll. the only thingg "Barbie" about youu is that youu fake! i just thinkk its getting out of control! smh*


but anywhooo, i think Nicki looks very pretty in this picturee. It shows a different side of her(:

waka flocka flocka waka?

who is this guyy? & who came up wit his namee? haha. i'm probably latee but i never heard of him till i saw his video on 106 and parkk. everybody is goinn crazy over his song: "O Lets Do It". i didnt like it at firstt, but dis shitt is growin on mee(: yeaaaaaauhhhh! oh lets do ittt!(: if i had dreads i'd be swinginn em withh dis nigga! haha but anywayss . . .checkk out the video:

BLAH,

it seems like justt when i thinkk things are coming into place . . .they decide to fall again. oncee i thinkk im in a good place, somethingg badd happens whichh makes me believe i didn't belong there in the first placee. NOTHING & i mean NOTHING is going right for me latelyy. i find myself saying "FML" a lot. & its not because im depressed or emo or anything crazyy. that phrase has just become a response for everything bad that continues to happen to mee. i know things will get better. the questionn is: WHEN!!??

Are You Still Downn.?

I pretty muchh thinkk Chris screwed his career. He used to be so finee when he first came out; & when i saw him on tv; I would start screamingg lol & just go crazy :) Now its just like ehhh whateverr. I mean his songs is cool but im jus not hyped about him anymore. "/

Heidi Montag=Hot Ass (Plastic) Mess!

here's AfricanBoi talkin about itt.

Take A Bow!

So there's this boy. I won't put his name out there like that, because I don't want his "little feelings" to get hurt aha. Anyways, he would always tell me that he wasn't like other dudes. (which i've heard too many times so it goes in one ear and out the other) but sometimes it actually seemed like he cared lol. He always calls me and asks how I'm doing . .blah blahh lol & i sort of pretend to give in just to see how this game is gunna turn out. From the startt, i knew he was a player, but he soon confirmed it. After a while, things he would tell me started to add uhp. He would say something like. . "I don't talk to a lot of girls, I just have friends", or "Baby you the only girl i want right now. I want to be with you forever". & my favorite . . "Don't listen to your bestfriend; she lie too much" . & i'm like wow are you serious? You expect me to believe YOU, who i've known for about a month, over my BESTFRIEND, who i've known for four years?! When she told me about all the girls you fucked around with & that I was your next "target" was soo funny to me. Boy move aroundd! You not even cutee; I don't want you!! I'm interested in somebody else!! lol. It's just suprising by how many lies he can make uhp so quickly! If you're going to play me, atleast get yo shit together first! All i want to know is why do boys think that girls are so stupid! We can see right through yalls lyin asses.! SMH . . I'm on to bigger and better things & best believe you will not be apart of itt. :)

*Btw- -Rihanna's song "Take A Bow" just started playing on my itunes. Ironic much?! :D

suchh a cutiee!*

-Justin Bieber